Motionless – Milly

5 Feb


I was driving down a long, misty, plain, strange, unusually dark road when I suddenly hit a bump in the road. I got out of the car to see what it was, worried I had damaged the car, when I saw her laying there. A beautiful, muddy, girl. Her face was pure white, wide eyed, her eyes were motionless. Those shiny, precious, gleaming eyes, just motionless. I was scared, I felt dizzy, what had I done? I went to scream for help when I saw something move. One of her eyes blinked. She was alive…


6 Responses to “Motionless – Milly”

  1. Julie Buckle February 5, 2013 at 10:08 pm #

    Beautiful writing, Milly. Fantastic word choices.

  2. Miss Ashton February 5, 2013 at 10:44 pm #

    A real thought provoking piece – Well Done Milly. Miss Ashton

  3. janeh271 February 6, 2013 at 3:32 pm #

    I really liked the description of the girl, very thoughtful

    • Mrs J Maitland February 7, 2013 at 4:46 pm #

      Milly what I was really impressed by was your ability to concentrate and work independently all lesson to produce TWO stories, both with thoughtful descriptions and eerie atmosphere! Well done!

  4. Lianne Allison February 13, 2013 at 9:37 pm #

    Fabulous! This is an amazing piece of work!

  5. Miss Loversidge February 13, 2013 at 10:23 pm #

    Your description makes it easy to imagine this scene – well done Milly!

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